With the National Football League (NFL) season coming to a close, Sunday afternoons of eating wings are coming to a halt. I have been reflecting on this past season: the Houston Texans’ shocking success, Scott Hansen’s constant prowess on NFL Redzone, and the numerous orders of wings I placed every Sunday. That got me thinking: What’s better, boneless or bone-in wings?
In the debate between boneless and bone-in wings, it is essential for members of the bone-in collective to preserve tradition. Over the years, wings have traditionally been eaten bone-in, so why change now? Senior Alex Leif takes the traditional approach, stating, “Bone-in wings are the real deal; they pack in way more flavor and juiciness.” Leif believes that there is something different about eating bone-in wings, arguing, “There’s something about chewing around the bone while you’re rooting on your fantasy football team that makes it taste right.” In agreement with Leif’s stance, senior Matthew Mintz, an avid football fan, states, “It’s absolute nonsense to pass up on bone-in wings.” With a hint of disdain for boneless alternatives, Mintz adds, “Anyone who prefers boneless is not eating wings the right way; it’s like settling for an off-brand cereal.” For Mintz, the choice is clear: when it comes to wings, we must embrace the long-lasting tradition of wings and football, bone-in, of course.
On the other hand, boneless wings are growing quite popular due to their versatility and convenience. Junior Byron Strug believes boneless wings are more nutritious, arguing, “Without the bone, you get more protein and more meat per bite, maximizing the dining experience.”
Many boneless-wing fanatics believe that eating wings with your hands is barbaric. Strug thinks that “Bone-in wings can be messy and inconvenient” and asks, “Why endure that when you can opt for a simpler, less messy option?”
Many boneless wing skeptics negatively associate boneless wings with chicken nuggets, attempting to diminish their essence. Strug responds, “When people compare them to chicken nuggets, what’s wrong with that? Let a brotha enjoy his chicken nuggets!”
Tradition clashes with innovation in the debate between boneless and bone-in wings, and convenience battles authenticity. While bone-in wing fanboys Alex Leif and Matthew Mintz honor the tradition of bone-in wings, Byron Strug and boneless wing advocates argue for the practicality and convenience of boneless wings. As the NFL season draws to a close and Sunday gatherings for wings and football pause until September, the question of which wing reigns supreme lingers.
